One of the things that new Muslims struggle with the most after reverting to Islam is, maintaining the relationships that they have with their non-Muslim friends.
Quite often these friendships have been formed over several years and buckle under the strain of a series of factors.
The first challenge is misconceptions about Islam that are promulgated in the mass media and exist in the minds of many non-Muslims. The second being that new Muslims are students of Islam themselves and are often ill-equipped to present the true message of Islam to their non-Muslim friends.
As a revert to Islam myself, I know exactly what it is like to lose a beloved friend simply because I chose Islam as my religion. The loss was especially hard given that I live in Kuwait and the friend I lost is back in the USA.
Reverts and Friends
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Her name is Shelly* and she tracked me down via a social networking website. We have not seen each other for the past 13 years since we were roommates in college and we just regained contact a few months ago.
The first thing we did was send a flurry of e-mails back and forth to each other catching up on the past years. She had decided not to go to law school and instead got her Masters degree in Theology. I too decided not to go to law school in favor of getting married and moving to Kuwait.
Throughout all our initial e-mails I kept putting off telling her that I had embraced Islam. I worried about what she would think given the distortions about Islam that are all over the mass media these days. Muslims and Islam are not portrayed in the best light and from my own personal experience with non-Muslim family members I have learned that many non-Muslims take issue with someone reverting to Islam.
It's almost as if it is a personal affront to their sensibilities rather than a choice for my life! I found this to be the case with Shelly. I finally told her that I had reverted to Islam in 1996 and had never known such happiness before.
Her reaction is what I expected, especially given her Theological background which I would have thought would have included a course in Islam. But it didn’t. Shelly bombarded my e-mail address with angry diatribes about Islam, Bible verses and as much "fire and brimstone" she could digitally send my way. Our renewed friendship ended almost as quickly as it ignited.
I did attempt to defend my religion by sending Shelly Islamic articles and verses from the Quran but the knowledge fell on deaf ears. I have not heard from her since but she did sign me up for a few Bible newsletters before she blocked me from her e-mail!
| When telling your non-Muslim friends about being a revert to Islam, you should not mince words |
The experience with Shelly definitely soured me from getting in touch with old friends from high school or college. How could my non-Muslim friends understand why I chose Islam or why I love Allah and Prophet Muhammad?
It was not until another friend, Bonnie*, tracked me down this past month via the net that I discovered the answer to that question. From the first e-mail I sent to Bonnie, who is a devout Christian, I told her about my Islam and my work forDawah. Much to my surprise, Bonnie was intrigued about Islam and wanted to know more. She did not condemn my decision or place judgment upon Islam or me.
She met me with an open heart and I shared my Islam with her. As of today, we have a running interfaith discussion about both our faiths and share a tolerance of each other’s beliefs for the sake of our friendship.
When telling your non-Muslim friends about being a revert to Islam, you should not mince words and be straightforward. We are blessed to be Muslim and for Allah to have chosen Islam as our religion is truly a mercy for us.
There is no need to scream "There is no deity worth of worship except Allah" (La ilaha illa Allahl) from the rooftop, however your Eman should radiate from every part of your body. There is nothing to be shy about. Irrespective of friendship, it is the responsibility of all Muslims to tell non-Muslims about Islam
Allah Almighty says in the Quran what means:
{…And who is more unjust than those who conceal the testimony they have from Allah? But Allah is not unmindful of what ye do!} ( 2:140)
However, before inviting others to Islam, all Muslims must properly educate themselves with authentic knowledge derived from both the Holy Quran and the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad to ensure that only the true message of Islam is presented as spreading misinformation or falsities about Allah, Prophet Muhammad or the Holy Quran is a grave sin.
It is possible to build a bridge of understanding with your non-Muslim friends. It is up to them whether they accept it or reject it.
Regardless, nothing should ever come between you and your Islam. The utter worship of Allah and splendor of the Islamic faith is the greatest possession any of us has and the true friendship that never breaks is with Allah, the One and Only.
* Names were changed for reasons of anonymity.
source :onislam.net
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